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Jokes for all!!!

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OMG!!! I was in the public toilets

and had just sat down, a voice

from the next cubicle said

"Hi!, how are you ?"

Embarrassed, I said,

"I'm doing fine.

The voice said "So what are you up to ?

I said, "Just doing the same as you,

sitting here !

From next door,

"Can I come over ?".

Annoyed, I said " rather busy right now?

The voice said, "Listen, i will have

to call you back, there's an idiot

next door answering all my


If it were u what will be ur response?


OMG !!!!


so it was YOU who was in the cubicle next to me !!!    



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What do you give a sick lemon?




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what's brown and sticky?




a stick

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This one cracked me up, it all, finally, makes absolute sense  :

You know how people send you a story claiming it to be true when obviously it isn't, well this really is a true story! 
Read on ...................

Once upon a time there was a king who wanted to go fishing

He called the royal weather forecaster and inquired as to the weather forecast for the next few hours.

The weatherman assured him that there was no chance of rain in the coming days.

So the king went fishing with his wife, the queen. On the way he met a farmer on his donkey. Upon seeing the king the farmer said, "Your Majesty, you should return to the palace at once because in just a short time I expect a huge amount of rain to fall in this area".

The king was polite and considerate, he replied: "I hold the palace meteorologist in high regard. He is an extensively educated and experienced professional. Besides, I pay him very high wages. He gave me a very different forecast. I trust him and I will continue on my way." So he continued on his way.

However, a short time later a torrential rain fell from the sky. The King and Queen were totally soaked and their entourage chuckled upon seeing them in such a shameful condition.

Furious, the king returned to the palace and gave the order to fire the weatherman at once!

Then he summoned the farmer and offered him the prestigious and high paying role of royal forecaster.

The farmer said, "Your Majesty, I do not know anything about forecasting. I obtain my information from my donkey. If I see my donkey's ears drooping, it means with certainty that it will rain."

So the king hired the donkey.

And so began the practice of hiring donkeys to work in the government and occupy its highest and most influential positions.

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